Bakkie Troost | A cup of Comfort
Een erg mooi, waardevol en persoonlijk interview
In 1983, wanneer ik elf jaar oud ben, sterft mijn vader. Sindsdien leef ik in angst dat ik ook mijn moeder zal verliezen. Wanneer ik in januari 2014 hoor dat mijn moeder ernstig ziek is, wordt mijn angst bewaarheid. Hoe zal ik reageren wanneer ik mijn moeder, waar ik zo’n hechte band mee heb, moet loslaten?
Voor wie de uitzending van 8 mei 2016 om 8:55 heeft gemist! Een erg mooi, waardevol en persoonlijk interview! Klik op bovenstaande foto om bij de video terecht te komen, druk even op de pause knop en dan weer op ‘play’ en kijk van 0:00 tot 7:45
A valuable and nice interview
In 1983, when I’m eleven years old, my father dies. Ever since I lived in fear that someday I would lose my mother. When I find out in January 2014 that my mother is seriously ill with cancer, my fear becomes reality. How will I react when I have to let go of my mother considering the close connection I have with her?
A very nice valuable and personal interview! Click on the picture above and I hope you’ll be able to click on ‘pause’ and than again on ‘play’ and watch the video from 0:00-7:45. Have a read at the same time. The translated text you can find at the bottom of this page. The video is in Dutch.
Translation in English
Hella: Do you feel like having a cup of coffee
Jannie: Yes, that would be nice……..
Hella: This is a very special gravestone, because I see the names of 2 women and 1 man. What’s the story behind this?
Jannie: The first name is my dad’s first wife, the second name is my dads and the last name is mothers.
Hella: At what point in her life did your mother get to know your dad.
Jannie: Mum actually got to know my dad during the time when she was helping the family. His first wife was ill and my mum was helping them around the house. So that’s when they got to know each other. At a certain point unfortunately my dads first wife died of a brain tumor and one thing led to another and they decided to become a couple…..All three of them are in the same grave. Mum died the most recent, on the 8th of April 2014.
Hella: Who was your mum and what kind of life did she have?
Jannie: Who was my mum…….I had a lovely mum. She was very grateful…..grateful for the life she led…..grateful that she got to know my dad.
Hella: That would have been when she wasn’t so young anymore.
Jannie: Yes….My mum was around 38 years old when she got to know my dad.
Hella: How was your mother-daughter bond?
Jannie: Very good.
Jannie: Yes….… the bond I had with mum was very good. I actually think that mum was the only one who knew everything about me.
Hella: How did you feel about the fact you were going to lose your mum.
Jannie: ………….when we first got the message that she was ill…………terrible…terrible…
Hella: What did she have?
Jannie: Ovarian cancer…………… at that point came through what I’d been afraid for, for a very long time.
Hella: And that was…….?
Jannie: That I was going to lose her………….. the thought of that feeling still affects me deeply.
Hella: Did you always have this fear?
Jannie: Yes…..yes….Actually I’ve always carried some fear with me…..I sometimes would say to mum; Mum, if you’re not there anymore, I’m not sure, but that will drive me mad.…..
Hella: What was it that made your mum being so important to you in your life?
Jannie: I think it had a lot to do with the fact that I lost my dad when I was eleven years old…….and when you lose one parent, you’re afraid you’ll lose the other one too. And I also think that it makes a lot of difference that I actually have been alone during most of my life. My father was not there anymore, so mum was alone too, which possibly makes you draw nearer to each other more easily…. She was very important to me.
Hella: Did your mother-daughter bond change when you knew that your mum was ill and probably might not be around for a long time anymore?
Jannie: ………..for me it changed in a way that our bond even became more intense.
Hella: Did you do other things together or did you share other things?
Jannie: Yes, the thing we shared very well, was talking about faith……and…..the future. The future of God’s house with many rooms….
Hella: In the afterlife?
Jannie: Yes…….in the afterlife…… I think that mum realized more and more that when the time would come that she would have to leave us, that she can go there….. she wanted to go there….. At a certain time in hospital when we were having a conversation, she said; your dad…(my dad also has been very ill)…..always said he did not experience his situation as suffering; “….comparing to what Christ accomplished for us, my illness means nothing.” This was a very nice thing for me to experience at that moment, because mum was also holding on to that.
Hella: Were you ready to let your mum go?
Jannie: In the end I could…. Yes.
Hella: What was the last thing you were able to tell your mother?
Jannie: “it’s okay, you can go”……….we’ve been able to sing a few songs to her; ‘Safe in the arms of Jesus’ and ‘What the future may bring’……. It was okay…….
Hella: Was is really okay for you?
Hella: What comforts you? Now your mother is gone?
Jannie: The love that I feel………….That touches me….. The love I feel from God….and….the fact that I feel and experience His presence so much in my life…..…… He was and is standing very close beside me.
Hella: Perhaps even closer now your mother is gone? As if He would take her place? To help you and support you?
Jannie: Well, actually He has had that place ever since my dad died……….God has always been in my life as a…….sounds cliché……as a big strong man……… so He always went along with me………………..
*It might be possible that the video will not be available for people outside the Netherlands. I want to apologize for that.